Sunday, July 29, 2012

Official Team C*NT FAQ - "Numbers don't lie!"

Nora Greenwald & Mike Summers
Official Team C*NT FAQ - "Numbers don't lie!"

This Q&A is part of our ongoing series to answer frequently asked questions about the investigations into Teen Challenge CULT.

Subject in question is: "The Standard Of Fail" Mike Summers, the only known fan and stalker of Nora "Molly Holly" Greenwald (WWE).

The purpose of these sessions is to clear up disinformation put out by the brainwashed cultists, and contribute to their leaders arrest. Current answer count is 10. Updated often. Know the truth.

Q: Why does Mike call himself "The Standard"?
A: He thinks he is a famous wrestling manager and is the standard which all others should strive to be. Heenan eat your heart out.

In reality, it was a laughable and pathetic facade Mike put on to lure in Nora. He was the man that met all of her "standards" (... or rather, standards he thought she had.)

Q: So how many wrestlers has Mike managed?
A: That's the whole thing about it. NONE!

Q: Why was he so obsessed with Nora? She's a pig.
A: He wanted to lose his virginity to her... because he believed she was a virgin like him (spoiler alert: she lied).

Q: What was CCW Oregon?
A: A supposed upstart wrestling promotion in Oregon called "Continental Championship Wrestling" that Mike claimed he was hired as the "head talent scout"...

But in actuality, it didn't even exist. All throughout 2008, Summers posted so much about this company on various message boards about "how big it was going to be", that real indy workers became interested in appearing on the show. Mike bragged steadily about the company's riches and future success, but oddly never once made any offers, advertised a card or talent line-up, or even seemed interested in... talent.

When pressed with questions on why he was even posting, Summers clearly didn't have the first clue about the wrestling business or what it took to run a show, causing concern amoung feds in the area trying to find out what was really going on with this thing.

Mike then said he was working for someone he called "Big Daddy" Joey Sanders, which was found to be some random 900lb dumbfuck wrestling fan on his friends list who had even less of a clue than he did.

After some simple investigation by calling up the Oregon State Athletic Commission, they found out that no one had a license to run on any of the dates or venues he was claiming, and that the whole operation was completely non-existent.

In other words: It was all BULLSHIT. There was no company. There were no employees. No one hired him. No shows were being ran. It was just Mike. Michael Summers sitting in his empty apartment annoying the internet and making fictional pages about an imaginary event that was only going to take place in his head.

Now the best part!
The first (and only) real person Mike contacted to appear on the "show" was of course, his beloved Molly Holly.

Because surely a former fat assed womens jobber from 10 years ago would be the #1 focal point to boost any upstart promotion.

In one of his many phone book sized MySpace blogs dedicated to Noreen, Mike noted that Nora was his first "talent selection".

Nora immediately claimed she was "retired" and turned him down before he could even finish typing his e-mail. Probably one of the few times she ever replied.

Interesting enough, Nora took an indy date about a week later. She just didn't want to be within 300 feet of him after the first encounter, and really who could blame her for lying this time?
The general conclusion is that Mike came up with the whole thing as a final desperate attempt to impress Nora to try and lure her into meeting him again. FAIL.

More than likely, the events and dates were just possible timelines of when he wanted to lose his virginity, "scouting talent" was simply code word for scouting her pussy, and this Joey Sanders was no more than his possible gay lover and accomplice to help hogtie her big ass in the back of the moving van.

He had never anticipated any real interest from the indy wrestling community who accidentily stumbled upon his posts and exposed him, since an actual wrestling show was the furthest thing from his mind.

It makes one wonder that if Nora did actually agree, she may have ended up in Mike's basement putting the lotion in the basket, because the only CCW Wrestling that was ever going to take place in reality, was Nora trying to wrestle her way out of his dirt cellar.

If only life was that sweet. For once, being an ignorant cunt worked to her advantage.

Q: What's the meaning behind "Numbers don't lie!"
A: Mike was also obsessed with aspiring pre-teen pop singer Brianna Rieffel and her song "Numbers Don't Lie". He made several Photoshopped banners on his sites and MySpace with an image of him and Brianna back to back with "NUMBERS DONT LIE!" written across the picture.
Why exactly, no one knows.

He may have just genuinely liked the song, but it's been heavily speculated that he did it in some strange way of getting back at Nora for ignoring his messages, by pretending as if he was now "with" Brianna instead of her.

As if Nora would care... or if Brianna was even aware of him... or that "being with" a 12/13 year old girl was in any way shape or form sane or legal.

Despite the disgusting display, amusement ensued as his trolls began to make jokes that he was calling Nora and leaving messages on her answering machine saying: "I called 25 times this morning. I know you got my message. Why don't you call back? Numbers don't lie!"

Q: Why did Mike suddenly stop stalking Nora after all those years?
A: He found out she really wasn't a virgin and disappeared in shame. Maybe killed himself. Maybe in jail now. Maybe chopping up bodies in a deserted cave somewhere plotting revenge. We don't know. He stopped posting and his internet trail went entirely dead cold. No one has dared drive to Yuba City to find out...

Q: Do you have any screencaps from Mike's original stalker sites or MySpace?
A: Sorry to say. They were a gem. We never expected him to baleet everything and no one really paid any serious attention to him at the time.

However, you can visit the Wayback Machine at, type in his main site, and see several save points from when it was open... but most of the images and links are dead (thankfully for the better of the internet).

Q: Is Mike a "Basement Dweller"?
A: Surprisingly, we have to now say no. He was able to understand she lied and snap out of it, so he isn't that dumb of a guy after all. Just nuts. While his cheap plan did easily get exposed, one must admit it still took some form of intelligence to plot the CCW scheme, write fake biographies to promote himself, and dream up the whole "Standard" gimmick. He was also of normal weight, appears to shave and has held small jobs enough to blend in with society, so doesn't technically fit the physical characteristics of a BD either.

He certainly shared many similarities with the obsessive behaviour found in wrestling fans, made a complete douche of himself, and surely may have wanted to rape Nora in his cellar... but Mike was his very own unique form of mental, moreso from letting his love quest/sexual perversions cloud his vision and get the best of him, which is why he has his own FAQ to document it all going wrong and those who were annoyed along the way.

Q: What is wrong with Mike, like mentally?
A: He's a christian kook. That explains everything.

Otherwise, if you're looking for a more proper definition: his behaviour easily classifies him as a schizophrenic and sociopath, which ties together why he was attracted to Nora in the first place.

Q: But don't you feel sorry for him?
A: Yes and NO.

Yes, because of how much of a cold-hearted cunt Nora was to him (which furthered the decline of his mental state and turned him into being a stalker).

NO, because of his obsession with Brianna which was blatant pedophilia. Sick.